July Dial-up Dilemma

(Courtesy of http://www.freefoto.com )

(Written 07/09/2010)
First, let me explain my lack-o-blogging (or any other online communication) last week. My mother was hospitalized for a serious (okay, life-threatening) infection (she's doing well; thanks for asking) so I was otherwise occupied.

Now that we're at Mom's house, my online access is limited to an old PC with a dial-up connection.

Wow. I mean, WOW.

I'd forgotten what the online world was like in the old days. It's like I traded in my Ferrari for a donkey cart. Mom is too sick for me to go out, so I have a bad feeling I may not be able to post this for a long time.

Yesterday, after waiting for Yahoo to load for five minutes, I decided to try to clean up Mom's hard drive and update her programs to speed things up. I cleaned up her disk, got rid of trash, pared down her start-up menu.

Pared a few seconds off the Yahoo load time. *SIGH*

HP wanted to update Windows, so I let it. Six hours later Windows XP Service Pack 3 was installed.

Six. Long. Hours.

The PC booted up a little faster this morning, but Yahoo? Not so much.

HP wants to update Windows again. *SIGH*

Think I'll try to download Microsoft Internet Explorer 8 instead.

If that fails, maybe the night nurse will let me upload this blog on the hospital's wireless system when I bring Mom in for her evening IV antibiotic infusion. Mom's nurses go above and beyond the call of duty.

Hmmm. I think Nurse Dave is on duty tonight. I wouldn't mind asking him.
Wow. I mean, WOW.

There's always a silver lining, right?

PFM Exists

Magic exists; my web guru told me so. When my computer made moves that my company IT guy (who shall remain nameless to protect his identity) couldn't explain, I jokingly suggested Old Unfaithful (Yes, I name inanimate objects, like cars and computers) must suffer from 'bad computer magic.' Could the problem be a Gremlin infestation?

Grinning, he nodded. "In private, we computer geeks call it PFM. Pure F#@!-ing Magic ." (FYI, I have no idea why my computer turned the F-word blue. Kind of freaked me out, considering the subject matter. No, really. I kid you not.)

BTW , the little guy in the photo is a gnome, not a gremlin. Gnomes are known for their love of travel. We ran into this one in Astoria, Oregon.

All things considered, I wonder why I didn't recognize the whole 'PFM Exists' thing sooner. After all, when email goes wrong, we're notified by a mailer daemon. Could the belief in magic in the web wizard world be any more obvious?

When I blog a 'PFM-Alert', I'm referencing The Unexplained. Not negative; just Unexplained, as far as I know. Feel free to put on your debunking hat and come up with a reasonable explanation--if you can.

Or don't.